CAFE

If you were looking, if anyone was looking, they would have seen a woman tottering down the street, head lolling on it's stalk as she slowly made her way to the only cafe still open. Probably drunk.

If you looked closer, if anyone looked closer, they would have seen she held her right arm to her side, that it was wet with a redness, and her glazed look was not caused by the stupor of alcohol. But nobody looked.

Not so far now. i can make it. Straighten up my hair, try to look nice. Mother told me to look nice. i never look nice. Even the johns don't think i look nice.
Take a breath, not too deep - owowow that hurts. Fucking bastard. Sick Prick. Didn't have to cut me up. And he smiled too.
Ankle hurts. Stupid cobblestones. Stupid shoes. No, smart shoes. Stillettos get me work. Don't trip, don't fall over. Not so far now. i can get help soon. Look at the cafe light.
Lots of people at the cafe, lots of help. Close seats are empty. Hard, cold seats. Grey people near the door. In case of trouble, near the door. Not that far away. Should i shout? Pull down skirt. Skirt too short. Try to look nice.
Prick. Took my money. My licence. My keys. Nobody will know who i am. Nobody knows who i am. Cafe not far. Fucking bastard! i'll get him. maybe. i'll get him if i can. If i get to the cafe then i can.
Look at the yellow light. Makes the people green. Don't laugh. dontlaughdontlaugh - owowow. Don't trip, don't fall over. Walk. Breathe.
Look at me! Look at me. Nobody comes, nobody looks. Look at the light. Just look at the light.
Cafe is warm and orange. Walk to the light. i can make it. i can make it.
i am going to die. fair?
i can see the waiter. See me waiter! See me! No. Still too far.
WHY CAN'T ANYONE SEE ME?
So much soft red. i never knew so much red.
Yellow light. Red eyes. Sore eyes. Don't look at light. Harsh light. Clear sky.
Bright stars. Far away. So far away. Stars. Stars.

If you were looking, if anyone was looking, you would have seen her eyes go white, seen her sway, and collapse. But nobody looked.


Michelle Wauchope ©1997

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