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This short
story - only 9KB or 3 printed pages - is the first in a series of
seven vignettes that deal with Jack and Daniel's evolving relationship,
but it can be read as a complete story in its own right. "This Is Me"
is
an interesting look, from a limited third person point of view, at
Jack's emotional reactions on the anniversary of Charlie's death.
The author has
captured Jack's feelings of grief very well, and one of the elements I
like most is the genuine feeling of emotional angst that's portrayed
throughout. Although the occasional sentence is a little too emotional
for me at times ("tears broke free of his eyes, blinding salty
raindrops
that took a piece of him with them as they burned their way down his
cheeks") the text is generally expressive without being too
sentimental.
It succeeds through a careful build-up of tension, as layer upon layer
of Jack's feelings are gradually revealed. It culminates in a
confrontation with Daniel, and his reaction is the crux of the story's
plot - one I liked very much.
The author's
characterisation of Jack, along with his response to strong emotion, is
handled with dexterity, and I really enjoyed some of the descriptive
images: "He swallowed the wave of pain that threatened to engulf him
with the oily ease of long practice." This Jack struggles against
revealing too much of himself but is eventually defeated by Daniel's
sincerity and open friendship, which I found perfectly believable
within
the context of this story.
There are some really
sweet moments between Daniel and Jack. In an interesting reversal of
the
usual slash scenario that nearly always has Jack comforting Daniel,
Daniel takes charge at the end and provides a practical outlet for
Jack's emotional turbulence. I found this intriguing, and a pleasant
change from the majority of Stargate stories that tend to display a
more
passive Daniel.
The language and grammar is nicely done overall. There are rather a lot of ellipses which bother me a little, especially since there's a tendency to overuse them in fandom as a whole, but that's just one of my personal pet peeves and other readers will probably have no problem with it. Daniel's characterisation is rather oblique, as we see him only through Jack's eyes. Jack's view of his friend hovers on the edge of idealisation, with its emphasis on the rather cliched fanon description of his "bright azure eyes", and the way he uses them (almost as a weapon at times, it seems!) to get Jack to talk. This story is technically pre-slash but could be read as gen: there is nothing here that would offend a non-slasher's sensibilities, only a deep understanding and friendship portrayed between the two men. "This Is Me" is rather a secret pleasure of mine. It's one of the earliest slash stories I ever read and I come back to it regularly when I need a nice, sweet, relaxing friendship story to read, with no sex and the promise of a happy ending. |
