BOOZING OUT IN MELBOURNE PUBS

A Eulogy

In 1980, significantly, the first year in which I was legally allowed to drink, John Hindle and John Hepworth (now, sadly, both gone to the Great Pub in the Sky) wrote a book called, not surprisingly, 'Boozing Out in Melbourne Pubs'.  Flicking through this book is like visiting pubs of old, ones that you remember fondly but that time and tide, the passage of years and changes in fashion, have forgotten.

So, given that it's been twenty-seven years since the book was published, I thought I might go through the book and lament the pubs that have gone the way of all flesh.  Which is to say, I shall look at the addresses of where the pubs were, and tell you what's there now and, if I've been there, give a review of the estaminet as it stands now.  There are more reviews to be had at MelbournePubs.com, but they are usually written by the sort of people who dress up to go to the pub, drink Corona with slices of lemon in the neck and value a pub for the bands it has on.

Let me state for the record that I think music in a licensed premises should be an offence punishable by loss of license.  It is less offensive than giving short measure or serving beer in a dirty glass, but more offensive than serving underage drinkers - who, after all, do no more than above age drinkers once they've had a few.  Come to think of it, I can put up a little protest here, can't I?

IF YOU CAN WORK, YOU CAN DRINK

Anyway, below follows my views on those of the pubs that have survived the nearly three decades since the publication of this fine work.  Where there are reviews at MelbournePubs.com I've put a link to those reviews under the address.  My personal remembrances and the thoughts of others - the eulogies - are linked to the name of the pub.  Think of this as my lamentation for all those pubs we have lost. . .

One of the best things is that pubs often change their names (time was no cab driver could find the pub I wanted to go to, because he would know it under its new trendy name and I would know it as the actual pub.  So by the time we worked out that the Chevron on Commercial Rd was now called 'Bumbags' or something, we'd be halfway to Mordialloc and he fare would be $200) but they rarely change their addresses.  So using the above table you can find out what great places like the Caulfield Club are like now.

The Usual Suspects, they being the normal pub crew with which (or whom) I drink, have been asked to give a rating out of five for the quality of the pub.  The average is then supplied for you to determine which of the pubs is best for you based on the huge demographic sampled by the pub night crew.  For comparison purposes each reviewer will have their ratings averaged so that you can determine whether someone is just overly enthusiastic about licensed premises or overly critical about them.

Last revised: Monday March 28, 2011 05:23:35 PM