Church Plays

© 2004 by Wendy Noble

Dan is talking, Peter and Andy walk in and sit down in the front row.  Myrtle, Jo, Earl and Ward react to his entrance. They nudge the person next to them, make comments, poke the person in front etc. before standing and moving out from their seats. They walk towards Peter and Andy.

Dan:  Just a few quick announcements everyone.  I’m looking for some volunteers.  We are considering holding a church banquet and, if it goes ahead, we will need people to help with cooking, decorating the hall, making invitations and so on.  I can’t give a date as yet, the council is still working out the details, but if you can help please let me know after the service today.

He nods and smiles, to acknowledge P & A’s arrival.  He continues…

The youth group are planning a car wash to raise funds for their Christmas camp and they will…

Earl:  Just a minute, pastor!  I thought I made my position clear on this person.

Points at Andy.  Myrtle, Jo and Ward nod in approval.

What’s he doing here?

Peter:  He’s my guest, Earl.  May I introduce you?

Earl:  Don’t play silly beggars with me, Pete.  A worship service is no place for the likes of him.

Myrtle:  Quite right!  She turns to Dan.  I am outraged, pastor.  The church council agreed that we should have nothing to do with this young man.  I don’t know how you can stand there and allow this to happen.

Peter:  We didn’t all agree, Myrtle.

Jo:  Now you’re splitting hairs, Peter.  You know very well what the consensus was.  You have some nerve bringing him into the sanctuary.

Ward and Myrtle nod their agreement.  Andy sits with his head down.  He is obviously regretting his acceptance of Peter’s invitation.  Earl has become increasingly agitated and has begun to pace angrily.  He spins around and points at Dan.

Earl:  I blame you. You’ve put Pete up to this. You did it to defy me.  I said this… this person and the good Lord don’t belong in the same sentence, let alone the same room, and I meant it. There’s no place for a filthy sinner like that (pointing at Andy) in the house of God. You disgust me. He disgusts me. I’m leaving!

He begins to walk out, closely followed by Jo, Myrtle and Ward, who are murmuring their agreement.  They freeze when they hear The Voice.

Voice:  Stop right there!  Everyone, except Earl, looks around, puzzled.

Earl:  Without turning around, still walking.   Don’t try to stop me, Dan.

Dan:  It wasn’t me, Earl.

Earl stops, turns around slowly, looking confused.

Voice:  This is your Lord speaking.

Myrtle curtsies, Jo and Ward are nervous, Earl is annoyed.

Earl:  That’s not funny, Dan.

Dan:  I’m telling you, it’s not me!

Voice:  Earl, have you forgotten that I am always present when my people are gathered together?

Earl:  Dan, are you sure?

Dan nods.  Earl looks unconvinced but willing to see it play out.

Voice:  This is My house.  Andrew Poole, stand up.

Andy does so, nervously, head still bowed.

Andrew, you are welcome.

Andy looks up in hope.  Peter pats him on the back.  Dan smiles.  The others looked shocked.

Myrtle:  But Lord, do you know what he is?

Voice:  Of course, dear.

Earl:  He’s a pervert!  He’s unnatural.  How can you welcome him?

Jo:  Forgive me for questioning your judgment Lord, but doesn’t Earl have a point?

Ward nods in agreement.

Voice:  I see… Remember the incident of the woman caught in adultery?  All nod.

What did I say then?  

They look thoughtful; Jo and Ward thinking harder than the others. They don’t want to let on that they only vaguely remember the incident and certainly don’t know the details. No-one answers.

Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone.

Myrtle:  Oh Lord, I don’t think this is the same thing.  We’re all Christians and he’s…he’s...

Voice:  Myrtle?

Myrtle:  Curtsies again [a quick bob].   Yes, Lord?

Voice:  Do you know who my earthly parents were?

Myrtle:  Shrugs.  Everyone knows that, Lord -- Mary and Joseph.

Voice:  Would they be welcome to have dinner in your home?

Myrtle:  Oh, of course, Lord!  It would be an honour.

Voice:  But they’re Jewish, Myrtle.

Myrtle looks startled and then drops her head in shame.  The others stare at her; Earl smirks.  She looks up, sees their scrutiny and walks slowly back to her seat.

Ward?  Ward had been quietly sneaking out.  He’s startled by the voice and shocked to have been caught.

Ward:  Yes, sir?

Voice:  Would you like to tell everyone what you’ve stored under your bed?

Ward vigorously shakes his head.

I didn’t think so.  Go and sin no more. 

Ward keeps walking out, now looking very embarrassed.  As he exits, the others watching him, the Voice continues…

You might like to have a small bon-fire when you get home.

Voice:  Jo.  Jo is startled.   When was the last time you spoke to your sister?

Jo:  But Lord, do you know what she did?

Voice:  Yes, Jo, I do.  But tell me, did she betray you like Judas betrayed me?  Did she have you whipped and crucified?

Jo:  No, Lord.

Voice:  You clutch your resentment and anger tightly to your chest, as if it’s a beloved child.  Let it go.  Go and sin no more.

Jo walks back to seat, looking thoughtful.

During all this Dan, Peter and Andy have been watching with interest.  Earl is nervous, but still angry.

Voice:  Earl, did you deserve my gift of salvation?

Earl:  Grudgingly,  No...not really.

Voice:  Does anyone deserve it?

Earl:  No…I guess not.

Voice:  I came to seek and to save those who are lost, Earl.  Would you say, Andrew is lost?

Earl stares at Andy and nodding vigorously.

Earl:  You bet!

Voice:  Are you telling me that Andrew doesn’t need saving?

Earl:  Oh no, he needs that all right!

Voice:  Are you telling me that I shouldn’t save him?

Earl:  Er… well… Is this a trick question?

Silence.

OK…OK…I guess you’re the boss.

Earl goes back to seat, slumps in chair with arms folded.

Voice:  Andrew, I love you.  I want to give you a new life, a transformed life.  Are you willing to let Dan and Peter explain it to you? 

Andy doesn’t respond. He is thinking.

You don’t have to decide anything today.  Just think about it.

He nods.  The three walk off together.

THE END

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