10th June 2003 - It's all in the numbers (what?)
A rematch three thousand years in the making! Can Bush the younger succeed where Bush the elder failed? Saddam's stronger than ever. And with a weapon of Mass Destruction reputed to be lethal, (but yet to be seen,) it's not surprising that the UN Security Council (them European pant-wetters) are scared. Can post-dot-com, weary America rise to the challenge? It's all in the numbers...
The Sumerians of the 1st millennium BC are the first well understood peoples of what is modern Iraq. Many dynasties followed. In the 7th century BC the Persians seized Babylon, and Iraq became part of Persia's Achaemenid Empire until it was conquered by Alexander the Great (334 BC). In the two centuries before and after Christ, Parthia and Rome fought over Iraq until, in the 2nd century AD, it was absorbed by the Persian Sassanian Empire. In AD 637 Muslim armies from Arabia defeated the Sassanians and Iraq became Muslim. In 750 the Umayyad dynasty centred on Damascus was broken up by the Abbasids who promptly moved their capital to Baghdad. The early Abbasids were Shi'ites, followers of Ali, the fourth Caliph and the son-in-law of the Prophet Muhammad. The Abbasids were themselves all but destroyed by the Mongol hordes in the 13th century. After periods of Turcoman, then Persian Safavid rule, Iraq was absorbed by the Ottoman Sultan Sulayman in 1534. It was to remain part of the Ottoman Empire until the end of World War I.
Iraq became an independent kingdom in 1932. A "republic" was proclaimed in 1958, but in actuality a series of military strongmen have ruled the country since then, the latest being SADDAM Husayn. Territorial disputes with Iran led to an inconclusive and costly eight-year war (1980-88). In August 1990 Iraq seized Kuwait, but was expelled by US-led, UN coalition forces during the Gulf War of January-February 1991. Following Kuwait's liberation, the UN Security Council (UNSC) required Iraq to scrap all weapons of mass destruction and long-range missiles and to allow UN verification inspections. Continued Iraqi noncompliance with UNSC resolutions during the past 12 years resulted in the US-led invasion of Iraq in March 2003 and the ouster of the SADDAM Husayn regime. Coalition forces remain in Iraq, helping to restore degraded infrastructure and facilitating the establishment of a freely elected government.
Iraq's entry in the CIA World Factbook was updated as recently as 30th April 2003 - no doubt to correct some very glaring errors.
Britain's American colonies broke with the mother country in 1776 and were recognized as the new nation of the United States of America following the Treaty of Paris in 1783. During the 19th and 20th centuries, 37 new states were added to the original 13 as the nation expanded across the North American continent and acquired a number of overseas possessions. The two most traumatic experiences in the nation's history were the Civil War (1861-65) and the Great Depression of the 1930s. Buoyed by victories in World Wars I and II and the end of the Cold War in 1991, the US remains the world's most powerful nation-state. The economy is marked by steady growth, low unemployment and inflation, and rapid advances in technology.
In other words, this plucky young contender has a troubled history, but has certainly profited from adversity - and wants to share this wealth of hard-knocks!
Let's get ready to rumble!
| 2002 | Iraq | USA |
|---|---|---|
| Population | 24,001,816 | 280,562,489 |
| Sex Ratio | 1.02 male(s)/female | 0.96 male(s)/female |
| Life Expectancy | 67.38 years | 77.4 years |
| HIV prevalence | less than 0.01% (1999 est.) | 0.61% |
The man-rich, sin-poor (as evidenced by their low HIV rate) nation of Iraq can't get a break! For all their piety, Iraqis live a staggering 10 years less than their infidel counterparts. And they're still outnumbered 10-1 by the diseased Americans. Unfair! But the round still goes to the USA.
| 2002 (USD/%) | USA | Iraq |
|---|---|---|
| GDP | $10.082 trillion | $59 billion |
| GDP - real growth rate | 0.3% | -5.7% |
| GDP per capita | $36,300 | $2,500 |
| Population below poverty line | 13% | N/A |
| Inflation | 2.8% | 60% |
| Unemployment | 5% | N/A |
| Debt - external | $862 billion | $120 billion |
All ex-Silicon Valley-startup-geeks are crying in their Starbucks (if they could afford it) at their country's woeful GDP growth rate. But they should spare a thought for poor Iraq whose economy contracted 5.7%! It's easy to see why: Americans contribute 14 times more to the world economy than the average towel-head. Could it be because the Iraqi Dinar is devaluing spectacularly? Could it be their crippling international debt, exacerbated by sanctions and alleviated only by the petrodollar? No, I'm sure it's just laziness. The US wins again.
| 2002 | Iraq | USA |
|---|---|---|
| Military Manpower - availability (males 15-49) | 6,135,847 | 73,597,731 |
| Military expenditure | $1.3 billion | $276.7 billion |
| Military expenditure (% of GDP) | N/A | 3.2% |
Looks like Uncle Sam won't have to break a sweat, (or re-introduce the draft). He could, in fact, just offer each Iraqi soldier $10,000 US Dollars to drop their AK47 and leg it to Syria. If this were rugby, it would be like the New Zealand All-Blacks playing the Livermore Primary Under-11 softball team. The US will be setting up a McDonalds in Baghdad before you can say 'Imperialism'.
Aah! There's nothing like coming straight out from the gym - where you've been bench-pressing engine blocks - to roll some drunk bum staggering around a shady street corner. You know you can take him because you mugged him just an hour ago. What's more, you discover he's carrying a gold Amex card, and the can of mace you thought he might be carrying ... doesn't exist!
Serves him right for all those years of self-abuse. He should thank you for the little wake-up call. And so should everyone else, for cleaning up the neighbourhood.
Yee-ah, it makes you feel proud to be American. Ooh Saay Can You Seeeeeee...
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